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Freitagsinfusion #54: Peinlichkeiten

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    Freitagsinfusion #54: Peinlichkeiten

    Heute interessiert mich nicht, wie ihr euch selbst beim Schreiben zensiert, sondern was euren Charakteren peinlich ist und wo er/sie schon alleine beim Gedanken daran im Boden versinkt. Oder gibt es Dinge, wo es ihn/sie nur stört, wenn es bestimmte Personen(-kreise) erfahren und beim Rest wäre es ihm/ihr egal?
    »Elezeis Blut schien in Aufruhr zu sein und brannte unerwartet kalt durch ihren Körper. Es war ein Gefühl, das nach Zerstörung dürstete.« – Blutgesang

    #2
    Einer meiner Charaktere ist krankhaft schüchtern. Seine heimliche Flamme bemerkt es einmal und sagts ihm direkt ins Gesicht, worauf er am liebsten im Boden versinken würde.
    "A writer is a world trapped in a person." Victor Hugo
    "Writing is hard work; it's also the best job I've ever had." Raymond E. Feist
    "Be inspired by others, but when you sit down to write, knock down any walls of doubt, and write like only you can." Lucy Knott

    Kommentar


      #3
      Meiner einen Prota ist es total unangenehm, wenn sie vor anderen weinen muss. Sie versteckt es in gewisser Weise schon vor sich selbst. Momente, in denen sie die Tränen nicht zurückhalten kann, sind ihr sehr peinlich.
      There is no real ending. It´s just the place where you stop the story.
      Frank Herbert

      Kommentar


        #4
        Dem Prota aus meinem letzten Projekt ist es nur peinlich, Fehltritte zu begehen oder unnützlich zu sein.

        Die Prota aus meinem aktuellen Projekt ist da schon etwas leichter zum erröten zu bringen. Sex und romantische Gefühle sind ein großes Tabu-Thema für sie, und sie würde lieber in nassen Klamotten rumlaufen, als sich vor jemand anderen umzuziehen.
        Ihre Sidekick #1 hat keinerlei Scham, bis auf ein paar Dinge, die sie in ihrer Vergangenheit getan hat.
        Sidekick #2 ähnelt dem anderen-Projekt-Prota. Sie findet es peinlich, Schwäche zu zeigen - bei ihr äußert sich das aber mehr in Aggressionen als in "Im Boden verschwinden wollen".

        Kommentar


          #5
          Meinem Prota ist es peinlich mit Frauen, die etwas von ihm wollen könnten, zu interagieren.
          Nein das war ich nicht.
          Ach so, das!
          Ja, das war ich.

          Kontakt: administrator@wortkompass.de

          Kommentar


            #6
            Meinem Paläontologen ist nichts peinlich. Außer dass er die eine Frau mag, die er auf keinen Fall mögen will.

            Meinem Pathologen ist es peinlich, dass er sich zu viel gefallen lässt. Und dass seine Flamme ihn mit einer anderen Frau gesehen hat, bevor sie seine Flamme wurde. Daraufhin meint er, nichts mehr verlieren zu können - und findet fast nichts mehr peinlich.

            Mein Pilot findet sich insgesamt peinlich.

            Meinem pseudopreußischen Polizisten ist peinlich, dass er zaubern kann und sich trotzdem nicht im Griff hat.

            Kommentar


            • Dodo
              Dodo kommentierte
              Kommentar bearbeiten
              Ja ... seid froh, dass es "Pretty Woman" schon gibt.

              Vielleicht kommt der pseudopreußische Polizist ja mal ins Konfetti ... Aber derzeit noch nicht.

            • Nachtmahr
              Nachtmahr kommentierte
              Kommentar bearbeiten
              Wenn er ins Konfetti kommt, kannst du mich hinzufügen, wenn du noch Bedarf an Konfettibesatzung hast.

            • Dodo
              Dodo kommentierte
              Kommentar bearbeiten
              Nachtmahr Freut mich. Sehr gerne!

            #7
            Meinem Hauptcharakter ist es vor allem peinlich, Schwäche zu zeigen. Er hat das Gefühl, dass er sich äußerlich stark und abgebrüht zeigen muss, obwohl er innerlich ein Wrack ist.
            Auch wenn er erfährt, was er im Suff angestellt hat, würde er am liebsten im Boden versinken.
            Man sagt, dass ein Buch Einblick in das Innerste des Autors gibt ... wenn das stimmt, möchte ich mit mir nichts mehr zu tun haben.

            Kommentar


              #8
              Oh mein Gott.
              Meiner Prota ist alles peinlich, was ein zu ehrliches Eingeständnis ihrer Lust/Liebe wäre. Je fremder der Mensch, desto dramatischer ist das übrigens. Nacktheit mag sie auch nicht sehr.
              Meinem Prota ist kaum etwas peinlich, dazu hat er wohl zu viel Selbstironie. Was ihm allerdings unangenehm ist, das ist, wenn er als "alt" im Sinne von "alter Knacker" empfunden wird von hübschen jungen Frauen. Und allmählich grübelt er über seine ergrauten Schläfen nach. XD (Edit: Ich hab ganz vergessen, zu erwähnen, dass sein Name ihm auch schwer auf die Nerven geht. Aber "Scham" ist ein bisschen übertrieben.)
              Einem meiner NCs ist unsauber poliertes Besteck voll peinlich (er poliert nicht umsonst den halben Tag sein Besteck in der Kneipe, lol).
              Und meinem Anta1 wäre es furchtbar peinlich, ein Heilsversprechen nicht umsetzen zu können und dadurch sein Gesicht als angesehener Psychiater zu verlieren.
              Zuletzt geändert von Mona; 16.12.2018, 13:57.

              Kommentar


                #9
                Prota #1 ist so gut wie nichts peinlich. Er sieht das als eine seiner Stärken
                Prota #2 ist das genaue Gegenteil. Ihr ist ziemlich viel peinlich. Wenn sie zu sehr im Mittelpunkt steht, wenn man ihr Komplimente macht, ...
                Prota #3 ist es peinlich Schwächen zuzugeben, Gespräche über seine Gefühle zu führen und unhöfliches Benehmen anderer Menschen.
                Ich arbeite dran ...

                Kommentar


                  #10
                  So ... it's a long scene. I was going for an overall awkwardness, with an escalation of the embarrassment towards the end. If you don't feel like reading the whole thing, here's the very embarrassing end (you don't really need to read the rest to understand it, it's just there for the awkward family drama):

                  'Uh, dad?'
                  'Yes, Lucifer?'
                  'I know it's not that customary in Heaven but ... we tip the staff here. About ten to fifteen percent, depending on the price of your order and how much you liked it and all. It's disrespectful not to do it.'
                  'Why? Are waiters not paid enough in Hell?'
                  'That's ... a long story. I've been trying to raise the minimum wage for a while, but let's not discuss that here. Let's just leave a tip and then leave.'
                  'Well, okay then.'
                  'Uh, dad?'
                  'Yes?'
                  'That's ... a very small tip.'
                  'It seems appropriate to me.'
                  'It really isn't.'
                  'How so? I thought the food and service were mediocre.'
                  'Are you fucking kidding me?'
                  'Of course, this would not help them improve. See, the waitress is coming back. Maybe I should give her more detailed feedback.'
                  'Don't! Seriously, don't. Just ... just ... nevermind, I'll tip her. You just stay quiet.'
                  'Really, Lucifer, you want to reward mediocrity? That seems very unfair.'
                  'What are you even talking about? Nothing about this restaurant is mediocre. Just ... Dad, for fuck's sake, give me my money back!'
                  'I really do not believe this is an intelligent move on your part.'
                  'But I liked the food and service. You give your feedback, I give mine. Just give me my money.'
                  'You are just trying to oppose me again. Miss, if I could please have a word ...'
                  'No! Don't listen to him! Dad, give me my wallet back!'
                  'What are you going to do with it?'
                  'That's none of your business. It's my fucking money, I can do with it what I want.'
                  'And of course you would choose to try to undermine me again. Have you learned nothing in the last two millenia?'
                  'You're being ridiculous! Just let me tip and let's go. You never have to come here again, but don't ruin it for me!'
                  'Ah, you're here, Miss. If I could have a word about our stay here ...'
                  'Uccidimi ora ...'


                  Ristorante Alighieri was one of the most sought after Italian restaurants in all of Beelz City. Tables had to be booked days in advance, even a week or two during the main season. Lucifer was grateful that he'd only had to wait three days. His father had not been impressed even by that short time, so he didn't even want to imagine the discussion they would have had if it had been any longer.
                  To say that Yahwe's sudden visit to hell had been a surprise would have been an understatement. Lucifer hadn't seen his father in over a millennium, and suddenly he was there, at his front door, claiming that he wanted to reconnect with his son. Lucifer could have shut the front door. He could have told his father to sod off and never bother him again. A part of him still thought he should have done just that, even though he knew Yahwe wouldn't have listened to him anyway. But he hadn't. He'd stared and stared, wide-eyed and open-mouthed, and then he'd stepped aside, still staring, and invited Yahwe in. After some awkward small talk, he'd found out that his father was so disconnected from Hell he knew close to nothing about it, and decided to show him around. It gave them something to talk about.
                  'So, uh. Do you like your risotto?'
                  God looked up from his plate. He'd taken on the appearance of a Mediterranean-looking middle-aged man to match Lucifer's skin tone. Not exactly dark, but not entirely white either. The looked similar enough for people not to question it when they introduced themselves as father and son.
                  'It is satisfactory. It arrived a little late in my opinion, but it was freshly prepared at least.'
                  'Well, it's pretty busy. They just have to serve a lot of people.' Of course, they hadn't told anyone who they were, which Lucifer was glad about. He definitely didn't want the staff to treat them differently and walk on eggshells just because God was there.
                  'Yes, I suppose so.'
                  'Yeah ... well, my pizza is amazing. I love their homemade pizza sauce ... You wanna try it?' Lucifer forced himself to give his father a cheerful smile.
                  'No, thank you.'
                  'Sure. If you change your mind, just let me know, I don't mind sharing.'
                  'Of course.' Yahwe's tone was only slightly off, but Lucifer could tell there was more he wanted to say to this. He was almost grateful for the awkward silence that followed.
                  'Anyway, what is this music they're playing in the background? It doesn't exactly add to the ambiente.'
                  'What? What are you talking about? That's Paganini's new album, he's an Italian legend! I mean, he went a little Punk since that collab with Sid I guess ...'
                  'It does not sound like the violinist he used to be at all. But even if it is him, it would not fit the Southern Italian theme. You might not know this, but Paganini was actually born in Genoa, a city in Northern Italy.'
                  Lucifer inhaled sharply, trying not to give a snarky reply. People were already giving them irritated looks and he didn't want to draw even more attention to himself.
                  'I know, but he's been living at the Costa Nera, which is in the South of Nuova Italia, for several decades now. We're not on Earth, dad. But, if you prefer some more traditional music, it's folk dance night tonight.'
                  'Folk dance? What about the patrons who wish to dine in peace?'
                  'Yeah. A lot of Beelz City's restaurants do that, to share the culture with their guests and all. It's very immersive. But they don't do it every night so -'
                  'Lucifer?'
                  'Si?'
                  'Why are you imitating an Italian accent? That is very offensive.'
                  'Oh. Sorry, I didn't notice. I just pick up accents really fast is all. And I'm fluent in Italian so ...'
                  'Well, try to control yourself. It is very inappropriate.'
                  'Everything okay? I hope you're enjoying your meal,' a waitress suddenly said. Lucifer hadn't even seen her approach.
                  'As much as we can, my child. If we need anything we will let you know.'
                  'Actually, could we have another carafe of the house wine? It's really amazing. Any chance I could buy a bottle?'
                  The waitress nodded, looking only slightly embarrassed, and quickly walked away.
                  'Did you have to call her my child?' Lucifer whispered. 'Look how uncomfortable you made her.'
                  'Did you have to order more of that cheap wine?'
                  'Really? What's your problem with the wine?'
                  'It has a very flat taste to it. In fact, I am wondering if the same wine was used in my risotto.'
                  'What? I thought you liked your risotto? And keep your voice down, people can hear you.'
                  'I said my meal is satisfactory. However, it has no character. It was prepared by a skilled cook, but with no passion or effort.'
                  'You must be joking! Some of the best cooks in town work here. And please, for fuck's sake, keep it down.'
                  'Watch your language, you are being very rude right now. I don't think anyone can hear us over this loud music anyway. I do not appreciate the level of noise in this restaurant.'
                  'I think folk dance night just started. Look, they're doing the tarantella.'
                  'They are not doing it correctly, then. How very unprofessional.'
                  'Actually, they're doing an Infernal variation of it as it's performed at the Costa Nera, Sir' a female voice interrupted them. The waitress had returned with a carafe filled to the brim with white wine that she poured into Lucifer's glass.
                  'Grazie,' Lucifer whispered and gave her an apologetic smile. She simply nodded a.
                  'The New Italian tarantella is a little faster and has a few extra steps at the sixth beat, right there, did you see? It also features some elaborate jumps if you're more skilled. But don't worry, we don't do those in the restaurant for safety reasons.'
                  'Really? How fascinating! I always thought it was just the fire dancing that was added in Hell.'
                  'Fire dancing? Isn't that a fire hazard?'
                  'We're in a room full of demons, dad. Take a guess.'
                  'I take it you're Celestial then?'
                  'He is. I moved here as soon as I turned eighteen,' Lucifer replied. It was close enough to the truth without seeming suspicious.
                  'Yes, well, if you could please let us finish our meal and then bring us the check?'
                  'Yes, of course.'
                  Lucifer sighed when the waitress took off. Instead of commenting again, he picked up his wine glass and emptied it within a few seconds.
                  'Please, that is very inappropriate. Can you not behave?'
                  'Why? You're the one who wants to leave soon and I love the wine.'
                  'Of course you would.'
                  'It's excellent, you know. As is the food. Maybe you should've ordered the pizza instead.'
                  'I have no reason to believe it would have been better. Anyway, here's our check. Let us pay and then leave.'
                  Yahwe reached into his briefcase and pulled out a few banknotes and coins that he counted carefully.
                  'Uh, dad?'
                  'Yes, Lucifer?'
                  'I know it's not that customary in Heaven but ... we tip the staff here. About ten to fifteen percent, depending on the price of your order and how much you liked it and all. It's disrespectful not to do it.'
                  'Why? Are waiters not paid enough in Hell?'
                  'That's ... a long story. I've been trying to raise the minimum wage for a while, but let's not discuss that here. Let's just leave a tip and then leave.'
                  'Well, okay then.'
                  'Uh, dad?'
                  'Yes?'
                  'That's ... a very small tip.'
                  'It seems appropriate to me.'
                  'It really isn't.'
                  'How so? I thought the food and service were mediocre.'
                  'Are you fucking kidding me?'
                  'Of course, this would not help them improve. See, the waitress is coming back. Maybe I should give her more detailed feedback.'
                  'Don't! Seriously, don't. Just ... just ... nevermind, I'll tip her. You just stay quiet.'
                  'Really, Lucifer, you want to reward mediocrity? That seems very unfair.'
                  'What are you even talking about? Nothing about this restaurant is mediocre. Just ... Dad, for fuck's sake, give me my money back!'
                  'I really do not believe this is an intelligent move on your part.'
                  'But I liked the food and service. You give your feedback, I give mine. Just give me my money.'
                  'You are just trying to oppose me again. Miss, if I could please have a word ...'
                  'No! Don't listen to him! Dad, give me my wallet back!'
                  'What are you going to do with it?'
                  'That's none of your business. It's my fucking money, I can do with it what I want.'
                  'And of course you would choose to try to undermine me again. Have you learned nothing in the last two millenia?'
                  'You're being ridiculous! Just let me tip and let's go. You never have to come here again, but don't ruin it for me!'
                  'Ah, you're here, Miss. If I could have a word about our stay here ...'
                  'Uccidimi ora ...'
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                  So ... yes, he is indeed embarrassed by his dad. There's actually a whole backstory behind the dynamic between these two, and it's not a pleasant one. Obviously. This scene is actually pretty lighthearted compared to pretty much every interaction they've ever had. It's also never gonna happen but I did enjoy writing it.
                  There are many ways to make music.

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